Republicans suck at any many things these days. They can’t legislate without consulting with trailer park Jesus or Brooks Brothers Jesus; they can’t scratch their ass without consulting with a guy named Grover. But if there’s one particular area of human enjoyment left that they are downright awful at, or just simply fall flat like German diver Stephen Feck, it’s humor. In order to excel at humor, you need to a) have a sense of humor; b) be self-depreciating and outside the establishment power structure, both of which are so distant from Republicans that not even the Curiosity Rover could find them. Show me a funny conservative and I’ll see your bet with the lost continent of Atlantis, a unicorn, and Aphrodite’s Magic Girdle.